Saturday, August 18, 2007

Do you ever wonder what cats are staring at - it appears they are staring at a blank wall or some other inanimate object and are totally fascinated by something. Being a cat-lover and having had cats all my life I have often pondered this. I have come to the conclusion through much ...uh pondering and soul-searching....that cats are insane or seeing otherworldly things. The cat stares at the wall...there's nothing fuzzy...nothing. So is the cat seeing something scary like that movie where only the little kid sees the creepy things? Or is the cat mentally unbalanced?

On that note...what about this cat Oscar who curls up beside residents in a nursing home shortly before they die, essentially predicting their death? Maybe this cat is evil....mwwhhhhuuuaaaa!

Maybe we don't understand cats like we think do...

A Cat's Diary

Day 183 of my captivity.
My captors continued to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape and the mild satisfaction I get from clawing the furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant.

Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded. Maybe I should try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors; I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair. I must try this on their bed. Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little kitty cat I was. This is not working according to plan.

There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More important, I overheard that my confinement was due to my powers of inducing something called "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage. I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches.

The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant. He speaks with them regularly and I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait.


BillyBob said...

I love this diary!I just found my old dogeared copy in a box last week. My four cats are plotters like this one.
Hehehe. Very very funny.Thanks for the kudos. Back at you.:-)

Sitting in Silence said...


Just found this blog last week. This is a really interesting post. I work in pallaitive care and we have a resident cat. The cat is 16 years old and only follows around certain staff.

His a kind of crazy feline with a demanding mind of his own.

I admire him because he has had to get along with so many people, he has choosen who feeds him and if one person is off you can be sure he knows who the next one on shift is going to be.

I remember one day, 2 staff members were off and I am placed number 3 cat feeder on his list. He was waiting for me to come through the door.
When I did, he gave a huge MEOWWW and then slapped me with his paws on the leg as if to say " about time" !....

Funny as !!

Ciarin said...

Cats really are odd creatures...

My mother's (who lives with us) cat is definitely like this one in the cat diary. There is an over hanging high ledge that runs the length of our family room and kitchen. We have a very large painting up there along with some southwestern style pots up there. While my mother and I were out of town, her cat managed to get up on that ledge and knocked over the giant painting (which is somewhat heavy), which then hit my daughter who was sitting below on the sofa. She was ok but it scared me a bit cuz if it had hit her differently, it could have really hurt her or even killed her. Needless to say the painting is now nailed in place and we bought a floor to ceiling cat post thingy for my mother's psycho cat.