Sunday, February 22, 2009


I was thinking about some of the really heartbreaking stories I hear sometimes.

I have a lady who is in the latter half of her pregnancy. She's young, this is her first baby, and the FOB is very involved. She was raped about four years ago and never told anyone but her best friend, and me. Her boyfriend has no idea. I don't know the cirumstances of the rape, but it becomes very clear that she has PTSD and is also suffering from depression. For unrelated reasons, I don't do a pelvic until about halfway through the pregnancy. It was tough for both of us - her because of unresolved issues, me because of the distress I caused her. Turns out she has chlamydia :( She hasn't told her boyfriend about her past and now this. She tells me he is very kind and supportive, truly a good guy. He comes for all her visits (she wanted him to leave for the pelvic which is when I discussed him with her). I encouraged her to not only tell him about the STD (of course, I would provide treatment for him as well) but about her history so he would understand what she was going through. She is entering into counseling also. She does tell him and when I see them, we talk about the STD, and about her history. She seems more relaxed and happier than I have seen her previously! He seems concerned but remains supportive and attentive. I am so happy that it is working out well - I was worried about his repsonse to all this.

I am hoping this child will be a positive life-changing event for them both.


Jules said...

I'm sure you already know of this resource but Penny Simkin's book When Survivors Give Birth has been such a help both to me (as a doula) and to some of my clients.

How wonderful that she is going into the birth now with open communication. Hoping for healing.

AtYourCervix said...

Thank goodness that you were there to care for her! Can you imagine the additional trauma if an uncaring or callous provider was taking care of her??