I had a delivery recently where I wonder if I did the right things. I think I did but my outcome was less than optimal. When that happens, which is rare fortunately, I can't help but wonder if it was somehow something I did or didn't do. What do you do about these types of feelings?
7 comments:
I'm not a nurse so I can't say from that perspective. I do know that human nature does leave room for many mistakes. If everyone is healthy then the ultimate goal was achieved.
We also always want to second-guess ourselves. What's done has been done and I know that after a couple days have passed you'll feel better.
Is there a co-worker or another CNM friend that you could debrief with, regarding the situation?
I do feel better now about it- I did debrief with one of the other midwives. She agreed with my management and suggested bringing it up for peer review at our next provider meeting, which I will probably do.
Some times bad things just happen and hindsight is fantastic- also people are only human and mistakes or poor judgment is made. All you can do is your best keeping the patients best intrest as your guide and hope for the best. I am sure you did a great job.
Thank you guys for your kind thoughts!
A former midwife director of mine once said to me, "I don't worry about the midwives who look back at what they did and question and review what they did. I worry about the midwives who don't question and evaluate themselves."
I find that those moments are great teaching moments. They hurt, we wish we didn't have to face them, it seems like the ugly cloud hanging over our heads will never leave. But I find it drives me to learn more, think a little more critically and gives me the incentive to be just a little better. (well, that's after I cry a lot, feel terrible, and about two years have passed). Hang in there. We all have those moments.
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